Recently, this topic often becomes the main one in glamorous women’s and men’s magazines, is actively circulated on the Internet, and is discussed in society. Hundreds of “gurus” are trying to give advice and teach naive humanity how to do it right …
Today, especially for Shkola Zhizni.ru, I will sensationally and for the first time in the history of not only Runet, but the whole of humanity will talk about how to do it right after all … Do not forget to include a sense of humor!
The first condition for the most correct sex is to determine the gender. This seemingly easy task at first glance is not at all as easy as it seems. External examination of oneself, a loved one, in a mirror, which thirty-fifty years ago was the most reliable method for determining sex, in our incredibly advanced century, no longer guarantees absolute accuracy.
“Women should have long fluffy hair,” you say.
Do not make me laugh! In your opinion, it turns out that Dmitry Malikov and Philip Kirkorov (in any case, before being shaved) are women? Why, what is there Malikov – even Stephen Seagal, who regularly finely chopped salad of international terrorists in his galley, by this criterion can be attributed to the fair sex!
No, this criterion is not good. The same can be said about pants and skirts.
“Well, I do not! – exclaim dear, but naive reader. “ If we see a woman in trousers regularly, then a man in a skirt is very rare!”
And again you did not guess, my reader. Men in skirts, that is, in kilts, today, like centuries ago, are not uncommon. Yes, and the long hair of the Scottish men is also quite in use …
So, the external examination did not bear fruit. Then we pass to tactile research. That is, to the commonplace feeling. But here, too, many pitfalls and obstacles await us …
What about the fact that you felt your developed (possibly not according to years) breast? Bodybuilders of the third size may well have bodybuilders, who, as we have seen on television more than once, can even put a glass of water on it …
You did not do bodybuilding? Then you could have been placed (while you were sleeping) breast implants …
So do not rush to conclusions … The exact answer will be given to us by the “sickly and hammery”, or rather , the “fagot and two-headed” passport. The first “tattoo” that tells you the truth will be your name. If your name is Irina, Natalya or, for example, Dazdraperma (you can find the full list of female names in the spelling dictionary), you can be sure that no matter what you saw in the mirror (short hair, muscles, stubble), you are a woman . But still, you should not rush here. It is advisable to look at the middle name and last name, but most importantly – in the column “gender” …
After we have decided on the gender, you can begin to take active action from the sphere of relations between men and women. What can be done in the first place is to try to find a partner.
It is possible that the partner walks somewhere nearby. Perhaps even in the next room. Having found it, do not bother to determine the gender by appearance or tactile method. We have already figured out that today these methods do not work. Immediately ask for the passport of your prospective sex partner . It will be good if he turns out to be of the opposite sex, while the names in your and his passport will be the same. This is the guarantee of the most correct of all the right sexes.
In this case, it is advisable to make sure that the partner is not your brother or sister, father or mother. To do this, open the page “marital status”. Make sure that your name and initials are written in the print on this page. After that, you can begin to have the right sex with a calm soul …
Suppose you are a man . In this case, everything is simple. It is necessary to inform the partner about your desire, and then free him and himself from clothing in the inguinal region. This is a working minimum, and it is likely that they will be completely freed from clothing.
Gustav Klimt, “Beethoven Frieze: An Ode to Joy. Spark of God (fragment) “1902 city of
Next is the operation of the donkey Eeyore, which he scrolled with a bursting ball, with one small, but with a very significant difference. Your “ball” should be inflated as it should. Take care of this in advance. Or ask a partner about it.
Continue the reciprocating movement until your partner says: “Oh!” After that, finish what your instinct tells you, rather, and begin to put on the groin area of your partner and yourself. However, if time allows, continue to do what your instinct tells you …
If you are a woman, surgery is a little more complicated . It’s not enough to tell your partner about your desire. It is also necessary to activate its “IR port”, which is not always, alas, ready for connection and pumping. However, if you like the partner, you may like the activation so much that you cannot come off …
But do not worry – your partner will definitely tear you off yourself, if not this time, then the next – for sure … However, the correct sequence of actions will prompt both of you instincts …